When Im gone

“Uhhh” Something is holding me down. There’s a tight pressure on my throat, I can feel their cold fingers wrapped around my fragile throat. Each finger slowly putting more pressure down. I know realize how much I’m in love with air. “Stop breathing” I can hear him say. It’s too dark to see his face but the light that comes through my window shines barely enough for me to see that the person who’s holding me down is a man. Defined check bones, eyes deep, I can also see he’s smiling. “This is the man to kill me” I thought to myself. I can’t fight back he’s over my knees.  I’ve tried to get away, I’ve tried screaming and nothing comes out. He’s laughing now.  With one last gasp for air he lets go, I fall to the floor gasping for air. The softness of my carpet is almost comforting and I think back to when all I did was lay on the floor. That memory is quickly taken away as my murder grabs me by my legs and pulls me to him. He slowly puts himself on top of me and whispers in my ear barely loud enough for me to hear “your eyes, their ugly.”  Then moves to my other ear “Your body, it’s ugly.”  He is now standing over me and screams “You are ugly! You’re not worth anything! This is why this is happening to you! You’re the one making me do this, you deserve this!” He covers my eyes with one of my shirts and starts to carry me down my stairs. With each step I know exactly what picture is on the wall. The one of my brother and I from last Christmas, my Great Grandparents on their wedding day, my Mom and my Dad. I wonder if they’ll miss me. If they’ll try to look for me. I wonder what my brother will say to his friends. He’s now running through my house through the living room destroying everything. He turns quickly and hits my head on the wall I don’t notice the pain until things start to get fussy and suddenly all black.

             I wake up to a dirty room; I’m on my side facing away from the wall on a even dirtier couch. I sit up and feel this pain in my stomach. I lift up my shirt to see stitches on my stomach. “Lay back down” a voice says. It doesn’t sound familiar, and there is no one in the room with me. It sounds like a woman. And then she walks in. Long and skinny, she has olive skin with long blonde hair braided. She kind of looks like me, she comes and sits next to me and hands me a glass of water “You need to lay down for awhile and let the stitches heal for awhile” she says to me in a soft caring tone. “I’m Annabelle, I’m going to be taking care of you while Ryder is out” Ryder must be him, the one that took me away from my house, away from my family. Suddenly everything comes back to me. I remember him taking me here, the car ride in the trunk. How he swerved so many times. Him slapping me so many times when I got out and started to run. I can feel the coolness of the table he laid me on. I can feel the pressure of the knife on my stomach. And his hands inside. What do they want with me? 

           Ryder is back. I can now see his face. He has black hair that’s slightly curly, deep dark brown eyes, and a skinny face. He looks sickly; he’s tall with really pale skin. He picks Annabelle up and kisses her.  I want to cry but I know not to. That won’t help anything. I need to find a way out but there’s no window. Ryder comes and sits next to. I move away slightly, he notices and pulls me to him. “I’ve always wanted a daughter” I look over to Annabelle, she’s smiling.

            If they wanted a daughter why can’t they make their own, why do they have to have me? I want my family, I want my home, I want my bed, and I want this pain in my stomach to go away.  It’s been about a week I think if I go off buy how long I sleep, there’s not any clocks in my room. I’m not allowed to wonder so I have to stay in the living room. I tried one day and Ryder and Annabelle both hit me. My stiches are fading fast. Ryder says we can take them out soon. So far there’s been no sign of my family trying to find me. I guess they didn’t want me.